Friday, December 25, 2009
When I was pregnant I would try to write at least once a month, to baby Ziggy, to I guess remember what had happened that month. I thought Baby Ziggy (Skyla) would like to read it one day down the road. Now that she is here, I use this "Baby Time, a fast, fun keepsake album" journal
My girlfriend gave it to me as a Christmas present last year (ironic that I am talking about it now) and I LOVE it, I am always wanting to find another copy (or 4) to keep tucked away for future children, and for baby shower gifts. It's fantastic, the pages are just super organized and easy to write in. The first 20+ pages are for writing facts about the month or whatever. And then the back half is more for pictures, foods (reactions, dates tried etc) dates of walking/crawling etc, first words, teeth (with pictures where you fill in which tooth and the date - super cute! Anyhoo, highly recommend it, and if you click the link click on "look inside book" to see sample pages.
However I do try to remember to occassionally do a full on journal entry addressed to Skyla, like my last post. And I like the idea of doing them here as well...in case something happens to the file on the computer. So my early new years resolution is to try and write her more entries, and get rid of this gut I have going on.
Back to Christmas!
What a wonderful day, Skyla was to interested in ripping the paper off her presents, even when helping her or letting things/noises peek out. Except for when he had 2, yep 2, babies being unwrapped, she was banging on the boxes wanting to get the babies out. She loves her dolls (a sign she wants us to have a baby? Hahaa A girl can dream) She loves her present from Santa, the fisher price laugh and learn farm...in fact I really want to pick up the living room second hand so one can hang out in the kitchen while I cook, totally has her entertained. And I feel like it's a toy that has news, lights and made of plastic that she may actually learn from...not just noise, and junk KWIM?
She only had ONE nap today, I am really hoping she is ready to be on a one nap schedule, just hoping it will be a LONG one. It was for 1.5 hours, so not to bad, but could have been longer ;) howevre she was not grumpy come bed time so maybe that nap was perfect! Skyla at all her meals (3 today) like a champ, loved dinner until she got ahold of her sippy. She is obsessed with water and could drink her water all day, which I don't like since she is just filling up on NOTHING, and probably the reason she has not been sleeping as well the past couple nights and needing to nurse (I'm E.X.H.A.U.S.T.E.D...again) so once I took the water away she had a bit of tantrum....lord help me when she is a tantrum-ing toddler hehee. She was happy as always, and for the first time in a loooooong time, she fell asleep while nursing, and stayed asleep. I love those moments and I don't want to unlatch her, it's like newborn days all over again and just fills me with this love or maybe emotion of....hmmm satisfaction, peace, comfort, ahhhhh/sigh :D and she STAYED asleep to be transferred to Gramma's arms, and seeing her asleep in her gramma's arms, boy let me tell you....that was beautiful! She is just SO.BUSY.SO.SO.SO.BUSY! I guess turkey, presents, jolly jumper exercise time, good company, and love tuckered her right out. Now here's hoping she stays dead asleep till 8 am (as I said, she has not been sleeping well, and I have been up late because of company here hehee)
My parents were here, my inlaws were here yesterday, so it all made Christmas that much more perfect being around our family. I'm so grateful that the my parents were able to make the trip out here, from Ontario. I love you so much Mom and Dad, and it means the world to me that you are here....even though I have been a bit cranktastic the past couple days (I blame the wonky sleep) I love having you guys here, and having our "family dinner" again :D
Last little thoughts on Christmas.
Christmas eve, Skyla took her first steps, 3 steps two times, between Nikita and I...YAY, but none today ha. That dang tooth didn't pop, I was really hoping her tooth would pop for Christmas, just to be corny (the song) and it hit me and almost made me cry, while we were doing finishing "touches" last night before bed....I'm a mom and now doing the things for Skyla that MY mom does/did for me, that I now have the "boots to fill" certain jobs to do, and traditions to make. DANG it, that reminds me we forgot to read twas the night before Christmas grrrr.
Okay I must take my turkey filled self, and get to bed, mama bear needs her sleep incase the bear cub wakes up early.
Lot's of love to all our friends and family. I hope everyone's day was as wonderful as ours.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Around 6 weeks old, my beautiful family
1 or 2 months - lounging at the beach on a sunny day
5 Months - cutest thing ever!8 Months old, trying homemade avocado rolls
I missed my shout out to the monster on December 16th. She was 41 weeks and 1 day, out of me for as long as she was in.
She is amazing.
Life before her seems so meaningless, and unfulfilled. I love my husband, without him I wouldn't be who I am today, and have what I have. He balances me, supports me, loves me unconditionally, he completed me until I had a child ;) our life before her was perfect, but we both agree that now it's magical.
The light of my life, apple of my eye, piece to my puzzle, all those cliche sayings!
Skyla it has been a ride, a dream, a bit of blur.
Thank you for,
not making me have crazy morning sickness
for allowing me to have a healthy safe pregnancy and waddle at 8 months pregnant walking dogs over ice and snow ;)
kicking my ribs, and punching my crotch
crowning for 3 hours, without me really feeling it
being a healthy perfect baby safely born at home
being relaxed, calm and content as a newborn, and sleepy relatively well
nursing like a champ and not causing pain or bumps in the road
good morning smiles, that make my tired eyes wake up, and grumpy mood lift
sleeping so well and not having a problem with cutting the soother out cold turkey
travelling easily and enjoying daily errands and lack of routine
dancing when I sing, even though I know it's not in tune and awful sounding ha
making me miss you only moments after laying you to sleep.
Thank you for being here, for picking us as your family ;) and for being the perfect cheeky little monkey that you are!
I love you so much, I'm so excited to see you grow into a toddler, run around the school yard, ask me for help with your homework, and boy advice when you are a teen, hold your hand and fight back tears when you leave for college, and can't wait to hear you gush about your own bundle of joy...because I get it, I understand that undeniable unconditional love for a little human.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
However the daylight had other plans, so we had to turn around about half way (or more) so that we would have enough light left to make it out of the trails. We hiked for about 2 hours, probably 8 kms. Next time we will head there earlier, so that we have time to get to the falls, and actually to my surprise, I wasn't tired and ready to turn around! Shocking, I know! And yay for me, I'm not sore today ***HAPPY DANCE*** Emi is exhausted though, which makes me a very proud mama, I feel so guilty that she does not get a daily walk in these days, but I have faith that we will be back to 2-3 daily walks again VERY SOON! I promise Emi. My other daughter, Skyla was a trooper, she didn't complain about being bundled up, or mama spreading vaseline over her face to attempt to protect it from wind, and she was pretty happy on daddy's back till the last 15 minutes. She even fell asleep for about 40 minutes, fresh air does the body good.
2 weeks ago I decided, that we HAD to go for a hike every week on one of James' days off, for the sake of Emi and my arse. Also because I don't want to be that family that coops themself up all winter, I want Skyla to be outside and appreciate the beauty and nature, and I want to be active together, and play together. My family always did the sledding and skating thing, actually my dad used to take care of our local outdoor rink, so there were plenty days that I would spend the entire day frozen skating around that rink with my dad perfecting it. But I myself want to be more active with hikes, snowshoeing (maybe cross country skiing and regular skiing when she gets a bit older) and keep at it all year round, teach my kids to be active and enjoy everything mother nature has to offer. Okay okay I'm coming down out of my hippy tree house! Anyhoo lastweek we were in Victoria, with no Emi, so hiking was a bust, but this week we got back from Victoria early, so the hike got squeezed in, and was enjoyed so much that we plan to hike on 2 of his days off (he is off wed-fri) Buns of steel here I come! I'm very pumped about this plan. If anyone can suggest some great hikes in the lower mainland, please feel free to leave a comment. It does not have to be stroller accessible, since we prefer to carry Skyla, it has to be dog friendly, but ON LEASH, is fine, as she cannot go offleash anyways, I just prefer it to not be 8 hours and intense terrain...eventually when I can handle that, I will attempt it ;) anyhoo I don't know of many places besides the Endowment Lands, Lighthouse Park, and Lynn Canyon, so suggestions are very welcome! And I would love places that are snowshoe friendly, but FREE...cause free is always better :D
I can't wait for a bit for a bit of snow (yeah I know I'm a weirdo) but I love being outdoors in the snow, when you are prepared...not when you are hiking across the mall parking lot in non waterproof shoes. Plus Emi adores the snow, she would play outside in it all day if she could, so she gets pretty deprived of that since it rarely snows in Vancouver city (last year being a fluke)
without further ado Drrrrrrrrrrrumroll.....pictures from James' camera of our hike
Me and my Emi, the river was so clear, just amazing!
James and Skyla, ignore his goofy double hat combo...he wouldn't listen to me when I suggested he not look like an idiot, until he saw it on the camera preview screen, pretty sure his words "why didn't you tell me I looked like an idiot?" Men! Skyla was super smiley and cute though!And she's starting to dose off.
Out cold...please don't flame this picture, it was about 10 seconds after the last and purely for photo op, I "tied" her head down so she wouldn't break her neck. We were using a loaner carrier and this one is not as high and does not have a "nap hood" so we had to improvise.
Family Photo, well you can only see a wee bit of SAnd here you can see our improvising, with a blanket I packed, with this exact purpose in mind actually hahaa. It looks a bit demented, but it kept her neck a safe and her face warm, and yes she could breathe! Skyla woke up...time for another family shot...good on James for finding sturdy tree's to set the camera on and racing back to me before the timer went off.
Grumpy baby during the last 15 minutes...trying to keep her entertained and playing peek-a-boo!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
In all seriousness, I am excited for those days, every day she changes and grows and I can't wait to see who she will be, what type of personality she will, how she will deal with situations and play, and what her favorite color will be. I suppose all of that will change each year, month, second, but I think all parents feel this desire and excitement of getting to know their child.
James can't wait for her to talk and say silly things on the phone like "hi daddy, I pooped in the toilet, okay have to get in tub, bye daddy love you"...or the like. A few weeks ago he was out of town for work with his boss, who has a daughter that is just over 2, he was giddy with how the daughter would talk on the phone to daddy.
Speaking of the phone, I don't know if it's just the flashy light and the novelty of "moms cellphone" but she lights up when she hears Gramma Diane say "Hi Skyla Raine" on speaker phone, her smile is huge and it just makes me all warm inside. Of course when I try to show Mom on webcam the little stinker does smile or do her silly face.
Speaking of the phone I have started to use it as my weapon during diaper changes, lay baby down on clean diaper, hand her phone while Gramma or Daddy chats away, snap up as quickly as possible. Sometimes it's not enough of a distraction though and a foot is needed to hold her in place ;) I get wanting to be naked, Heck I would probably go pantless all day if my butt was as cute as hers and it was not such an eye sore and the mail man would not turn red a beet when I answered the door hanging all out....but why oh why is diaper change such a fight. Or clothes in general, as soon as you get the shirt over her head she starts to whine. What a bugger, my a cute lovable bugger she is!
Little Miss Skyla is 8 months today. Her accomplishments:
-mastered crawling and standing (way long ago in August, what a smart gal)
-mastered furniture cruising about a month ago
-babbles a bit, mostly baaa baaaaaa bleeeeee blaaa sounds but not into imitation yet
-knows how to french kiss the dog
-definitely knows her name, and what each tone means :P
-understands "milk" and the sign for it....which looks like a open closed fist wave hello, so at music class when we sing goodbye and everyone is waving...she burrows into my chest. So bye bye is waving side to side for us hahaa. But she won't sign it back.
-I think she understands "eat" and the sign now
-this week James and I have both witnessed her standing unassisted for about 3 seconds, very random and crazy...I don't think she realizes she is doing it.
-she is eating really well right now, loves blueberries, grabs handfuls of them ha. And she devoured her cinnamon waffle for breakfast, baby led weaning has been my best friend with introducing solids to Skyla.
-and I have only changed one poopy diaper in about 2 weeks, she has been pooping on the toilet...it's easy to know when she has to poop, and it only happens once every other day, and we are home a lot....so it has been easy for us.
She is in love with her baby Ziggy, crawls around while holding onto her
Skyla and her friend Lila, jamming
Halloween playdate, jungle kingdom!
I'll post a picture of her 8 month shot later!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Being a cheeky monkey and pulling out all the DVD's...the day after we decided mounting the stand to the wall would be wise. Ironic timing?
Playdate with her best friends
Stealing toys!When I had Skyla and kept hearing about solids and when to start and how to serve it I was getting extremely overwhelmed and so stressed over what was the right way to do it. Before I had her I knew I wanted to make my own baby food, but I had no idea that their were so many "rules to follow" and they all seem so confusing and so many ways contradict the other. I stumbled across a forum talking about Baby Led Weaning and clicked to see what it meant...I clicked because I knew I was not going to set a date for weaning Skyla and that I would/will let her decide when she is done with nursing. So I thought this forum was support for it, until I started reading and quickly learned it was a way of introducing solids to your baby.
No spoon feeding, no measuring, no rules really....I immediately felt such relief. There was no criticism and no guilt. It seemed like a lot of stress would be avoided. The one stress upon starting this "baby eats what we eat" style of feeding was choking, gagging and appropriate sizes (no teeny tiny finger foods to start, but big whole pieces) and of course making sure I am making healthy meal choices, no frozen dinners (not that I do much of that anyways)
Anyways it has been going really well, she has gagged on a few things that made her throw up a bit (toast and brocolli) but she goes back for more and I have avoided gray hair! But I think maybe she just was not quite ready. She still mostly plays and makes a big mess of herself, not much of a mess on the walls and floor (yet) but it really amazes me to watch her handle the food, get it to her mouth...and the fascinating part MOVING it around inside her mouth, I can her tongue move pieces of food from side to side, and see her chew it with gums. I have started to add small pieces into the mix to help her pincer grip develop, and that took no time, she can pick up her Nutrios, blueberries, pieces of spaghetti, and small cubes of cheese no problem. She is like a tiny little adult, well maybe not quite so delicate or coordinated, but you know what I mean? Right?
Our other huge big girl success:
Pooping in the toilet. It's quite obvious now when she has to poop, she does a tippy toe dance and a few grunts. The first time I plopped her on the loo, was because she was in the tub, and I did not want to deal with floater! The next day, tippy toe dance after a nap, ripped the pants off, and success...and no clean up, no poopy diaper to deal with! I am not completely gung ho into Elimination Communication (EC) I don't plan to offer her the toilet or potty every 40 minutes or whatever to pee. A couple times a day, and definitely whenever I notice her having to poop.
Yesterday morning, after nursing her I figured why not see if she will pee, I sign potty and make a pssssssssssssss sound, sure enough she peed after a minute, and lo and behold she squeezed out 2 rather large turds (TMI, whatever!) Yay!
This morning we have already had 3 successful pee's in the toilet and one pee in her diaper, she has been naked lots (also to air out a slight diaper rash she has) and no accidents. I want to pick up a potty to have her "bathroom area" in the living room in hopes that she will learn to crawl there when she has to go and I will help her. ECing is not suppose to be "early toilet training" but learning to communicate with your baby and understand her cues, so it fits right into the way I want to raise her anyways listening to her and following her lead, nurse on demand, naps when she is cuing not on a schedule and letting her what she wants on her dinner tray. I am also trying to remember to sign things like milk, drink, eat, more, play, and all done, hoping she will pick up and we can communicate more.
Anyhoo it's time to get a diaper on her butt and into bed she is getting whiny and rubbing the eyes. Lights out ;)
Monday, September 21, 2009
Tomorrow I am headed out for dinner and a bellini or two (or perhaps a margarita, since we are going for mexican...mmmmm salt, lime, tequila, maybe I should take James up on his offer to drive me) with 2 of my mommy friends. We don't get away from our mommy duties often enough, well at least not me. So we have vowed to make it a monthly thing, maybe we will be more brave after tomorrow night, and making it a bi-weekly event.
James is all by himself tomorrow and I am not at all nervous, actually I secretly (well not so secretly anymore) hope she has a meltdown...even though I know he won't admit to it, or text me in a panic...the way I do haha. However I am sure it will go super smoothly with her just a bit cranky when she is saying "okay daddy it's time for bed!" but she will chug her bottle, crash and probably sleep through the night. And I will get the "it was so easy" speech. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, he is beyond wonderful at being a daddy and the most patient person I know. He appreciates me being home with Skyla, and he knows it is not always easy, even with an "easy baby" But I just want for him to experience for one day (or a week) what it is like to be a mommy, a food machine, a maid, a laundry mat attendant, a dog walker, a cook, a poop picker upper, a poopy bum wiper and cloth diaper toilet dunker, a wife, friend, sister, daughter, grocery shopper, meal planner, clothing shopper....an organizing stacking planning food producing shopping cleaning maniac hahaa. I guess I feel like no matter how many thanks I get, he will never quite understand. On the plus side, he has started to pick up after Skyla when she is down for the night (cleaning up her toys, so the living room is adult friendly) so I guess constant asking and reminding that x y z needs to get done to keep me sane, works. Some might call it nagging, but I call it marriage, working together and helping out. Next plan of attack, after a dinner I cook, you clean...and that does not mean putting away leftovers and stacking the counter neatly so I have dishes to do in the morning ;) it also means when you clear the table it needs to get wiped down too hehee. Men are funny creatures.
Onto Skyla business....she is sitting up so well now, she has been sitting for a couple weeks now, but finally she is sitting up STRAIGHT, like her friends do. I was thinking she was doomed for bad posture like her mama, but she is perky now YAY! No walking yet, thank god. I might invest in some leaded clothing to weigh her down, since she has been standing since the day she started crawling (woe is me!) She gets food every couple days now too, whole food, we are not going the pureed food and cereal route. She mostly just plays with it, and finger paints the table with the pieces she mushes around. But that is what food should be about right now, playing with, figuring it out exploring taste, feel, texture, smell, and how to hold things and aim for your mouth (not that I have anything against purees, this is just super easy and laidback with no pressure, right up my alley!) Tonight she had chicken, brocolli and some garlic mash potatoes. I don't think she ate anything, well maybe a few tiny pieces of chicken, she managed to bite off a GIANT chunk with her gums (super tender chicken I guess) and just smiled at me blowing spit bubbles with her mouth so full of chicken!
She has also tried:
hummus, pita, babaganoush, cucumber, carrot, sweet potato, avocado, celery, toast with applesauce, shredded cheese, navy and black beans, pear, rice, a few spoonfuls of soup, and banana.
She is also totally in love with her sippy cup and prefers cold water.
Here she is sporting a new outfit from a friend, she looks so grown up, I can't believe she is big enough to be wearing "little girl outfits" and not just yoga pants and a onesie, or romper type of outfits. So cute :)
And making out with the cup! seriously she chugs it back like this all the time!
Well that's all folks,
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
And I thought I would share my 2 cents or feelings, sorry if it's rambly, but I intend this to be more like a journal entry of things that have arose and feelings I have.
When I got pregnant I never for a moment, thought I would be mixing up bottles of formula, I knew I would definitely try to nurse Skyla. I was a bit scared and worried, as I did the big mistake of "reading on the web" and hearing horror stories of women in pain, bleeding nipples, cranky babies etc etc. But I thought "how can something our body is suppose to do be so hard?" but I guess I could say that about labour...throw tomatoes if you like, but I found labour and delivery much easier than most women describe it. Yes I was exhausted and there was a time when I was so bone tired (lack of sleep leading up to it, and your water breaking after a long week of walking around miles and miles in hope to bring labour on, breaking just as you lay into bed will make you tired haha) a time that I thought to myself "I can't do this, I am to tired" tired, not in pain, not scared, just tired. Actually right after I wanted to go and do it again, but this time with sleep, to see if it would change at all. Yes I'm crazy, we know that!
Feel free to throw more virtual tomatoes....just as easy as I found labour and delivery of my baby (not the placenta, it was not hard, just did not happen, so that SUCKED!) I found breastfeeding a breeze. Skyla was a hungry little piglet, she latched on well, she slept pretty good, she was happy, no supply issues (still to this day I have to much milk actually) no nipple damage, she nursed quickly - no hour long nursing sessions every hour, so I was a happy mommy, and able to get out and enjoy life as a mom in public and not feel trapped at home nursing around the clock.
I consider myself VERY lucky, and I know a lot of women that have had troubles, some who found the strength to keep up the battle with the breast, and others who decided breast is only best if everyone is happy, and a happy mom is important. Stressing about nursing does not make you happy, so formula can be a saviour. I have no judgement towards mom, and my mom friends who use formula, I know the majority of them feel very defeated and guilty. DON'T!!! And I really try not to be "braggy" because it feels like everyone I know has had bumps and hurdles and a hard path to get to where they are now.
As easy and natural (for me) as breastfeeding has been we did have a few bumps along the way, when she was a few weeks old she would scream at the breast, because my letdown was/is so active and she wanted to comfort nurse. I would have had no problems in her comforting herself there, but she clearly did not want a meal...so we introduced the soother. Around 2-3 months she also was fighting at the boob, and I have no clue why, I thought my supply was diminishing, but I think it was more of an evening out thing and she was being super impatient since she did NOT have to work for milk for the past 2 months. That was a stressful time, the milk was there and ready for her, but she was so impatient and would get upset after only sucking 2-3 times (what a diva ha) she figured it out eventually though that 5 sucks and it would come pouring out. Now our "issue" (I hate using that word) is her distraction, she has always been a quick nurser, but now she just wants to be playing and crawling and avoiding food, until bed time. It makes for quite the scene when trying to feed her in public, since she likes to pull off just as a letdown is happening. I want to cry at the milk that gets wasted since she decides "look at this leaf, screw milk, I want to crawl" but it's a never ending supply....so as the saying goes "don't cry over spilled milk" right?
Anyhoo that's a bit of history I'll try to get back on track.
Where was my train of thought going....breastfeeding, nursing, that article....
Hmm well firstly I don't get what people's obsession is with breastfeeding, every feels the need to ask "are you breastfeeding?" and then it is usually followed by "how long do to plan to do it"
I admit, before I was a mom, before I was pregnant, I was very much in the "if they can ask for it" or "once there is teeth, no more!" camp. But once I had this little lady growing inside me and I knew I wanted to breastfeed, those timelines completely vanished. I get quite annoyed actually when people ask, for one it's none of their business, and for two I honestly feel like it's not my right or decision to just make a deadline and cut her off of amazing nutrition that cannot be found in any wonder food, avocado, flax, salmon, the wonder goji and acai berries, ain't got nothing on the milk that comes from a mother. Did you know that breastmilk also works wonders for skin ailments, like rashes, body and bum, eye infections, cuts and scrapes. I am pretty tempted to concoct a breastmilk mask for these stubborn hormonal pimples I have. Usually when I say "well I plan to let her wean herself, I will let her nurse till she decides she is done with it" and almost every has some sort of reply to it along the lines of "but not past 1 years old" and "if you don't set a limit" or "it just gets wrong at a certain age".....why are others so concerned, and why is it wrong to nurse a child past the age of 6 months, 1 year 2 years (depends on the crowd). Like I said I was of the other camp before I was pregnant, however I never thought someone else doing it was wrong, it was just a personal preference at the time...or maybe what I was used to with family friends. Why do we live in a society that is so set on timelines, rules and charts? If they sleep in your bed, you will never get them out...if you nurse her to sleep, she will never learn to get to sleep on her own. You have to start cereal at this age, she needs more than breastmilk....blah blah blah. But I suppose that is a whole other blog about guidelines and rules ROLLING MY EYES!!!!
So world, family, friends, and strangers to answer you question...
Skyla will nurse until she is done with it, I will not force her to stop, I will wean her on her terms, that being said I also will not force her to nurse, it goes both ways. However most people seem to think that just because a mom is not weaning her child, she is making her child nurse. Not the case...cause any parent knows it's a hard task to get a child to do something they are not interested, why would anyone TRY to force feed their child...purees, finger food or milk.
My other thought on nursing, bottle feeding and formula is:
Why? Why do some families decide to formula feed from the start without even giving breastfeeding a try? I don't understand why one would not try to do it. But I also don't understand women who are dead set on having drugs involved in labour. I am very much a give the natural way a shot, follow babies lead, and do whatever it takes to make them happy, even if it means doing something you were so dead set against (like co-sleeping, we did it, she has not needed it for a few months now, but if she needed it she would be back in our bed no questions, I miss the ease for night nursing. At first I couldn't imagine having a child in bed every night, now I understand families that do, and I understand some babies need it, some toddlers need it.) I'm all for the path of least resistance ;) If Skyla is happy I am VERY happy. So yes formula is sometimes the path of least resistance, when you have tried and tried to nurse. But to not try at all? To make a choice to not give your newborn the health benefits that formula definitely cannot, if anything even for a week or two to get the really rich colostrum. Why???? Is it because you think breasts are meant for pleasure only? Is it gross to you? I'm honestly curious. Is it convenience? Cause personally I find a bottle a PITA, my milk is always available and at the perfect temperature and travels where I go without the need of extra weight of bottles (well maybe a little extra weight since they are slightly bigger than pre-baby) This is not at all meant to say formula feeding is wrong (I was formula fed, whatever! My mom did try to BF with me, and I appreciate that and I love her regardless, and would love her just the same had she decided to not try bf'ing) and I love my mom friends and their babies that use formula. I just want to know why some make that decision without giving breastfeeding a try?
I am sick of feeling bad or frustrated about Skyla nursing herself to sleep. It does not happen every nap or bed time. There was a point, where I felt like she would only go to sleep at the breast, and that I was never going to be able to leave her with someone else, and that I could not have a night off, that she would always need me (what's so bad about being needed?) and I was breaking down and dealing with "try this and that" and dealing with feeling like she should not do it, and that I had to train her to put herself to sleep. But I honestly think this breaking point that happens for a lot of us nursing moms, is also at the same time when babies sleep becomes very disrupted and all the lack of sleep we as moms (and some dads) catches up to us. So we have an overtired, emotional mom, and a sleep protesting baby. Truthfully I don't think we ever catch up on the sleep, and it seems like every 2 months is another "sleep regression stage" or another milestone that fucks up the 2 days of pretty good sleep and routine you had going on (teething, crawling, sitting, standing-yeah my child decided to do all that in one week, the teeth not exactly so the first 2 weeks of her crawling and standing is a foggy blur gahh, and then walking, talking, climbing yadda yadda) so at the first breaking point, we start to feel a pressure that baby will never not nurse to sleep. Well I am pretty sure there are not many 13 year olds that need their bedtime nursing session. And for us, we got past that, and now I really enjoy bedtime, and nursing her before bed, I find it very relaxing to me, we pop in a lullaby cd, she smiles at me, and plays with my face when she is done, or taking a break, one the nights she does not fall asleep (which yay is more often than nights she nurses to sleep) we have a cute little routine where I sit her up and we put our foreheads together and she smiles and giggles at me while looking me in the eye, I think she thinks I look funny, cause I know she looks funny from that angle. She gives me a kiss and then it's bed time. Sometimes she is not done eating and will want more 15 minutes later, and I'm 100% OKAY with that. Oh and those couple nights a week when she dog tired, and cranky, and relaxes once we nurse and falls asleep, my heart grows 3 more sizes filled with even more love, she snuggles in and sometimes I just sit there with her head on my should asleep for a few minutes, enjoying the love and snuggles. I think any mom of a crawling, active and fidgety baby would understand where I am coming from. Those days of snuggles are long gone, so when she falls asleep at the breast and snuggles, I soak it and hold onto the memory and feeling for as long as I can, because I already feel like I forget how she was as a snuggly sluggish newborn and fear I will forget these moments as she becomes more and more independent and "not needing mama"
So to all the breast feeding moms out there, who are in that place of feeling like you will have to nurse your little one forever, and feeling guilt that you want to make them figure it out with you (I know I felt guilt, which is why I trucked through) and sick of hearing it from whomever in your life is haggling you about nursing them to sleep, follow your heart, and do what you feel is right for you and your baby! It will be get better and easier eventually. And for all the other people opposed to nursing them to sleep because "it's wrong" take a hike. I bet you have a nightime thing too, even something as silly as putting on lipchap before bed, try not doing that and see how well you sleep and how much you toss and turn before you cave and grab that tube of lip chap...yes I need lipchap before bed, and a glass of water, and I have to be able to see what time it is, if I can't see what time it is at all hours when I wake up, I wake up constantly fretting about the time, so we have a clock that projects the time onto the ceiling ;), we all have our quirks. A baby dependent on mom and dad for safety, love and food should not be expected to kick a bedtime bottle or breast for our convenience.
Yet another irritating question, well statement "she is sleeping through the night?" I don't even sleep through the night, I wake up to pee, get some water, and stretch or change positions. And when I say well she wakes up 1-2 times, I get this look of horror...there are nights when she wakes up 4-5 times, those are the hard nights ha, but again thankfully my babe goes back to sleep after getting her soother of nursing if hungry so I can go back to bed in about 2-15 minutes. I used to just fall asleep with her laying beside me, even though her crib was in our room, it was comfy in our bed and I would pass out. She is now in her room, so it's a bit more convenient to stay in her room on the chair to nurse...I still doze off for a minute here and there though. For the most part she sleeps from 8/8:30 - 1ish sometimes to nurse sometimes just for a soother, then back to sleep till 5ish to nurse or soother but sometimes she sleeps right till 7:30, she is not a routine girl. I personally don't mind 2 wakeups. I prefer when she does a 3am wake up so I can sleep from 11-3, but whatever. Anyways if your baby is over 6 months old they *should be sleeping through the night* and weaned of night feedings. Uhmm okay?! That's not to say it's easy, it's tough and tiring and especially for mom's whose babies wake up screaming, 4+ times and take an hour to get back down. I appreciate that she prefers to comfort nurse the soother than me...it's the active letdown, she knows better than initiate a volcano when she is not hungry. But I still have to get up and comfort nurse her with the soother, since she refuses to figure out how to find one of the 6 in her crib on her own, and sometimes I think she just needs and likes the help, she gets to smell and feel one of us. How is that selfish, she is a baby. But so many experts make it out to be that our baby is selfish and manipulative. phssssssssshhhhss to that. Also on the co-sleeping note, I fully support it to whatever age your child needs it! I actually enjoy when James has a morning off and he wakes up with her and brings her into bed for a morning snuggle, sometimes we all get to fall back asleep and sleep in, who doesn't love to sleep in! But sometimes she just wants to crawl on, say good morning, and poke our eyeballs. I do miss having her in our room, even when she was in the crib in our room and not in our bed for the whole night. I am grateful that she decided on her own at a young age that her crib is not so bad, and that she did not rebel against going to her own room.
If you are interested in the article that helped me here is the link
...helped me realize I am right. Not that you are wrong if you are doing differently, just that sometimes we get a little wound up with right and wrong and really it comes down to what you are comfortable with that is what is right, and for me this is my comfortable life, so it is right. I enjoy reads like this, since so often I feel put down or judge or in the wrong (about many other parenting choices not just breastfeeding) because we (both James and I) feel no need to put a boundary or limit on our child right now, we don't follow rules and guidelines, we don't stress on schedules and routines, and we very much believing in following our instinct.
Anyhoo, my thoughts for the day...well clearly enough thoughts for the year!
Skyla is awake from a long afternoon nap (WOW!) so I am going to go and nurse my milk loving booby monkey.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Tuesday, she was showing off at a picnic with other babies around her age, crawling (at turtle speed) around the blankets and ontop of the other babies hehee. Since then, it has been crazy at our house, I cannot leave the room for more than 1/2 a second, cause she is across the room, eating the cat scratching post, or dog bed....yummy hair! Pulling things down ie the laptop and camera (cords/strap hanging = bad mommy) and on tuesday when she mastered the crawl, she also decided to be a BIG girl and pull herself to as standing. I swear I almost cried, not because I was proud, but because it means, my life as I knew it and the wee bit of freedom I had left once she figured out the roll, is gone. Heck, she might as well be walking.
So now she is crawling and pulling herself to a stand, on the couches, ottomans, and her crib, so her mattress had to be lowered and I am terrifed she is going to go crashing and squish herself into a corner of the crib.
On a sidenote, I bought a second hand freestanding Jolly Jumper off craigslist for a whole $25 best thing ever. She has been a bit irritated with her jumperoo lately, to many colors and lights and music maybe? One can hope she has a simple easy to please child that boo's the bright flashy toys of today's society. Anyhoo the Jolly Jumper is straight up AWESOME. It is my sanity saver, my go to when she gets grumpy, and my 15 minute tea/blog/facebook break hahaa. Skyla just loves jumping in it, I think she enjoys the freedom she might feel confined in her jumperoo, and probably feels like she is actually standing, and it has much better bounce then the other one.
Another part of her big girl days, since we had to lower the crib we decided to take it apart and move it to her room. Well the past 2 nights she has spent the majority of the night in bed with us, whether or not it's because she has to I don't know. Mostly I think it's just me being lazy and falling asleep with her in my room while nursing, rather than nursing her in her room. Ha!
I don't think Daddy James feels like she is old enough yet though, and I don't think he is totally ready for it either (which surprised me!). I had no problems with her sleeping in our room in her crib, it was easy and convenient. The only downside really was when I had laundry that needed to be put away, I never had time to do it, until she was napping and would not risk waking her, so laundry was always getting shoved into a messy pile in the closet. So we will see if it sticks :P
I can't believe how quickly she is growing up, how fast she changes, and how eager she is to learn something new. I love my little Skyla, and love that she is now a little person, with a personality, who smiles at her mommy and daddy, webcams with her grandparents, talks to the animals. She hugs me and needs me for than just boob juice, she has started reaching out for me which just melts my heart...and has even started to understand "kisses" ...at least I think so. Can you tell it's a mushy day hehee.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
I do not expect them all, and really don't want you spending money on me either (right now) but incase you happen to stumble across this (I may or may not leave it open for you to accidentally see ;) hehee) and are stumped as to what to get me...any one of these items would be heaven on earth.
-Hybrid Shampoo Bar
our daughter has taken quite the toll on my lovely locks, and my hair is in need of repair from my favorite hair products!
My face is also ungodly right now hahaa.
-Fresh Farmacy face cleanser
-Sweet Japanese Girl - which is being discontinued :( I will be stocking up for sure!
-A face cream either imperialis, ultralight, or Enzymion
-Mask of Magniminty
I love all Lush stuff, so you know I would be happy with anything from there :D
I would also adore a 2nd Mommy Necklace
I have been drooling over these 2 collections
and I think I prefer the mod flat rock, because of the 24 inch length. I like locked donut as well, but I am not sure if it will be a bit short...but either style or color would be greatly appreciated.
A date night would also be fab-tab-u-lous, but with Nikita being away, I suppose that can wait till Septembers "you're the most amazing mom and wife" holiday, hehee.
Did I mention how much I love you...ALOT, like alot, alot. More than a fat kid loves cakes, more than bee's like steak on the BBQ, more than flies adored shiza.
Don't worry I won't forget about, "you are the most wonderful husband and caring father I know" day :D
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
During my wedding planning days, I spent ALOT of time on a wedding forum, mostly in the destination wedding section. I eventually moved onto miscellaneous and hung out there where the topics were mostly random and fun, and sometimes off the wall hahaa.
Can you believe how big she is getting, she comfortably fits into some 12 month clothing, she is so dang tall!!!
Monday, July 13, 2009
So Skyla and I went to ontario in June to visit my parents, Tom and Heather (my inlaws) were also visiting Toronto area, so they stole Skyla and I a few times to show off their granddaughter to a few friends and family :D My little girl did really well with all the travel, she was a superstar on the plane, and did so well with long days of trekking around. Then the Presnail's joined us in Vancouver and spent a couple weeks in BC...so it's been a busy couple weeks with family. I loved every minute of it, and miss our family so much :(
I think I already mentioned that she learned to roll early June, she is no rolling towards both sides, took her about a month to figure out to roll to her right as well haha. She is also now rolling back to her, pivoting around and inch worm crawling. She is NEVER where I last left her (in her crib or on her blanket on the floor, she moves so much its crazy. Actually she is crazy strong, I think she has been sneaking spinach behind my back...either that or my breast milk is crazy iron rich ;) hahahaa. Yoga is her fortay, she can hold herself in a modified cat position (sort of frogged leg and chest off the ground on her elbows, she has also shown me the downward facing down, and can do the plank position no problem.
Emi is her best friend, she follows her as much as her head and body will allow...I am sure that Emi is the reason Skyla is "commando crawling" she will be chasing her in no time hehee. Today Skyla was full on laughing at Emi god it was hilarious. I have a couple videos to share instead of pictures!
And we also went camping this week with the little Miss, and she did awesome, it was not much different camping with her than last year without her.
Well I am sure I am missing a ton of things, but on to the fun stuff...videos of my chunky monkey!
This is in ontario playing peek-a-boo with Gramma
Sunday, June 7, 2009
It has been quite a busy month with 2 trips to the island in May, and then the first week of June was filled with lots of FIRST's for Skyla. Nick Dale came to Vancouver for a visit, it was not long enough and you need to come back soon, Skyla took a liking to Nick right away and gave him tons of smiles, and fell asleep in his arms on his last night here when we were out for dinner. He was staying at a friends condo, and there was a pool in the building....so we took Skyla for her first swim, and she really seemed to enjoy the pool. Was not crazy happy and smiling, just very relaxed and content :) James was even brave enough to dunk her a few times and she was such a brave girl not one tear or upset peep about it (or the other 2 afterwards hehee)
She let out a couple of super cute giggles as well, which we managed to get on camera...I'm still waiting (patiently) for the continous giggles. But she seems to think its funny when I tell her "I love you" and talk in weird voices.
We also took her to the Vancouver Aquarium, and she enjoyed the tank with the sharks and giant sea turtle. She really is an amazing little person, so full of character and so laid back. We love going out with her cause she is almost always in a perfect mood, and when she fusses a bit its over within a few minutes (for the most part ;)!)
All week she has been lifting her legs and pivoting herself around the floor and her crib, and at night rolling onto her right side and sleeping on her side. Last night she was on her play mat and managed to roll herself over from back to front, and get her arm out...not so happy once on her belly (she likes tummy time sometimes, and other times hates it ha)....
So this morning I laid her down on the floor to see if she would do it again, but mostly she just wanted to hang out on her side, till she got really excited and kept rolling over, fuss that she was on her belly, flip her back to her back, and she would roll almost right away, fuss....you get the picture, it was quite the up and down morning for me hahaa. Took me awhile to get these pictures and posts up (she is now sound asleep for a nap) She did roll from belly to back...by I think accident on May 29th - has not done it since
Anyways I thought I would post a ton of pictures and videos, since I have been so busy and unable to stay on top of this blog. We head out to Ontario on monday, just Skyla and myself to visit my parents (Gramma D and Grampie D - we have two sets of grandparent P's, so since my parents are D-ale and D-iane it works as D's..I also call my mom, Mama Dee) anyhoo I am not sure if I will be bringing my laptop to update pictures while we are in ontario...but if not hopefully I will get online to type a bit.
I think she will be hitting lots of mini milestones this month. She was even trying to rambo crawl while on her belly today....not saying she will start crawling since most babies don't seem to until 7+months but who knows ;).
It was a great day, and I was on my best behaviour...now they are talking about taking me to the zoo! Mama really hates caged animals but me to learn about them :)